3 months before the big day

so after a long journey, on our 5th anniversary night, he pop the question..

 ...

and i said "yes. you're crazy."

now, we are preparing our wedding.

and it's suprisingly chaos.

 but i'm still extremely happy.

 

God, help us.

H-11

WTF. OMG.

*fangirling

and back to him

still with him.

facing another obstacle to keep us get going.

God bless us.

welcome back

and

he's back in town.

still single.

believing

 so it's october already.

i've been busy with several fun stuff, 

having faith in every step :)

love is not real

Romeo and Juliet is not a love story.

It's a 3 days relationship between 13 years old and 17 years old 

that caused 6 deaths.

xoxo

who was hurt most

I'm letting go to see if you'll hold on to me
I'm in doubt of what is thought and what is real
In our room, between the shapes I thought I knew
A guillotine, a pillow with feathers like snow

I've come to a listening post beyond your lines
I'm all ears to gather clues and look for signs
But I can't hear the song you sing while you try to soothe
Why are you whispering while the bombs are falling?

Go easy on me, I can't help what I'm doing
Go easy on me, oh, I can't help what I'm doing

Hello again, I buried you, where have you been?
My renegade, you came back from the labyrinth
Unlike me, you've looked for things that could be found
And the thread that guides through black times

Go easy on me, I can't help what I'm doing
Go easy on me, oh, I can't help what I'm doing

When thoughts had outnumbered spoken words
In the early hours we failed to establish
Who was hurt most

Renegade by Kings of Convenience

randomly weird

i don't know what the fuck she saying but i sing a long anyway.

cheers

on my worst day, he cheer me up.

he always do.

(here's my screenshot with my TOP while we singing bad boy hahaha)

and we end up karaoke-ing via skype :)))

thank you. you're such a GOOD friend ja.

this is crap

no more.

fuck you.

four years ago

yes. time did flies.

why won't you

How could you do it
I couldn't say
Years built on sand
June until May
Second to second
Lied even while you held my hand


It's death for the living
Yes I am a ghost
The mirror is cloudy
I loved you the most
You threw out the pieces
Did things we didn't understand


He doesnt't want her but he just won't let her go
She started breaking but she still won't let it show
He doesnt't want her but he just won't let her go

The Big Fight by Stars

"why wont you just let me go, 

so i could break and build into something new, something better than you"

today midnite movie :

American Heart (1992)

Edward Furlong ♥

you have to watched him in this movie xx

is it?

"This just might hurt a little.

Love hurts sometimes when you do it right.

Don't be afraid of a little bit of pain, 

pleasure is on the other side."

Save Room by John Legend

we were made for sunny days

spending 3 days in Bali.

blue sea, warm sand & gold sky

:)

should i swim along?

i have this really strange feeling. about me. about you. about us.

and the ironic thing is i'm having a serious issue about sharing deep emotion to anyone. somehow i can't do it. i lost words and avoiding it. saying "it's nothing" to my own mind. i can't stop thinking. because we both are leo, born with the same month. 
do you feel this too? do you avoiding sharing a deep emotion too?

i saw this movie. about how people close to each other, seeing each other everyday but the fact is they don't understand each other. and suddenly i kinda feel that way about us. somehow it feels related to what we had now.

is it true that romance only exist in movie? is it true love just something that some poet or writer made up? is it true couple only need commitment to get through? if one of them make a mistake and break the commitment so what should be the reason for them to stay together? if the reason is love, what kind of love?

i admit that i'm the person who always hide inside the comfort zone. am i only afraid loosing my comfort zone? am i only to scare to be alone? if yes, is it wrong?

it feels like all of this is sinking into an unknown object. i still questioning it, wheter i should scream histerically asking for help or should i silently saving myself or should i swim along?

twenty-five and yearning for a ticket out

from 2006, i keep turning back listening to their music.

it's like seeing a sunlight slightly through your window and suddenly for no reason you feel warm 

and you smile :)

today midnite movie:

6 years in love

exactly.

in love

i'm in love with the girl on my desktop.

who is she?

today midnite movie :

71-Into The Fire

warning. tears will be coming out.

btw my brother bought me this dvd cause he knows how i love TOP these days. how sweet :)))